What is secondary gain REALLY?

While I’m not a licensed professional, allow me to share some items regarding secondary gain that I’ve learned over 20+ years working with clients.

Secondary gain is a gain… Meaning the person believes the benefit of having it outweighs letting it go.

What they don’t realize is it is running their life. There are situations that occur purely because of the desire for the secondary gain.

This becomes important because when I help someone with secondary gain, the more unconscious it is, as I get to the real root of it, the person will have a tendency to dodge because they see what they are getting from the secondary gain and fear letting that go.

But again… It’s running their life. So it’s my job to hold them accountable to clearing it.

A secondary gain is polarized like a magnet. This polarization creates havoc in their life. And it requires facing both poles of the magnet.

Someone with secondary gain will come up with whatever excuse to keep the problem.

No matter what price you give them, it’ll be too much, and they’ll have some excuse.  It’s all a ruse to keep the secondary gain.

If you already state a price and then adjust it, they say “that’s not fair to you.”  Again, a dodging technique.

If you don’t charge them, then right when you get to put your finger on the secondary gain, they run away, because there’s no investment and no opportunity to hold them accountable.

It’s a waste of time on the master practitioner to not charge – the act of charging alone weeds out who is feeling enough pain to get rid of the secondary gain.

I know people who have taken out 5-figure loans to do it.  Early on in my career I used to say: “Sell your cellphone” – just to prove the point that they value their phone more than getting rid of the problem.

They will value the secondary gain until the havoc the problem is causing outweighs the gain itself.  You’ll see this in many forms – one form is the procrastinator – they’ll keep complaining about a scenario (I see this in relationships a lot) and not want to solve it.  I also help a lot of coaches, and in there, this shows up in the form of story.

At the end of the day, if someone doesn’t want to solve it, they just aren’t experiencing enough havoc from the gain yet, and it’s just a matter of time, because the magnet is spinning.

If you put a large electromagnet in the center of your living room, it’ll pull things towards it, erase computers, create a magnetic field that messes with your physiology, etc.  That’s the same effect secondary gain has…on the person’s life.

What I do now is neutralize the magnet.  This approach has a ripple effect, and I get more impact in less time and charge less per hour.  If someone can’t afford my $375 for 90 minutes, they are literally telling me keeping the secondary gain is worth more to them than $375.

I share that because it’s important to convey that everything I do is designed to get someone the result.

The act of paying for a session gets the person out of the story if they go through with it.  And if they don’t go through with it, they haven’t yet experienced enough havoc from the secondary gain to want to nip it in the bud.

I tell people not to come to me if they want to keep their problem.  Because they do find out that I don’t buy into their story, and I’m able to get to the root with precision, so as soon as they see a glimpse of the real secondary gain coming to light, they will dodge if they haven’t paid me and do a live session so that I can hold them accountable to getting through it.

I have no interest in helping people who want to keep their secondary gain.  I am, however, inspired to help those who want to take that leap of faith, lean on me, and allow me to guide you to neutralizing the magnet of the secondary gain so that we can get your life back on track.

Are you getting further and further away from how you want your life to be? If so, that to me is describing the spinning of the magnet increasing.

The problems that come from getting further and further away from how you want your life to be are basically the various things the magnet is grabbing a hold of.

What we’d do is neutralize the magnet… if you are ready.

I can’t say how many sessions it would take as it depends on your responses to my questions, but I know one thing: I’m dedicated to solving as much as we can in one session.

I guarantee you that as long as you answer my questions honestly and thoroughly I will get it to clear.

There may be times during the session where it’s not comfortable for you, and you may even hate me during the process.

I am certain that if you stick with me, you will be grateful for the experience because it was necessary to get you the result.

As long as you answer my questions honestly, I will get to the real root – the thing keeping you stuck that others have failed to address.

And I will do so without judging you, for we are all in this together.

Ready to finally address the secondary gain in your life? Click here now to schedule a diagnostic session.